Over the last few months, I’ve found myself amid the center of vehement nutritional arguments about fat, carbohydrates, calories and diet.  I have found it fascinating that very intelligent men and women, over the last 50 years, have accepted, without reservation, a dogma taught them by their eighth grade nutrition teachers.  This dogma is interlaced and interwoven throughout the textbooks, manuals, and college cafeterias throughout the world.

Very few souls have questioned this dogma, and even in light of it’s utter failure to improve one’s health, it becomes the fall back point upon which millions have accepted nutritional disease and defeat.  It makes no sense that a dogma of this nature, without anything more than a scientific corellation in the 1960’s, could sway the minds of intelligent researchers, physicians and scholars for over 50 years.

It is a well known fact, however, that hydrogen is the most common element in the universe and is used as a basic building block for most molecular structures.  What many don’t realize is there exists another element yet to be added to the periodic table that is almost as prevalent called moronium (pending symbol approval  – Mu).  It fills the blank space on the table of elements between Hydrogen and Helium.   I, and those who have been able to identify this element, suspect that moronium is a gas at room temperature and has some affinity to binding the white matter of the brain responsible for catechol-O-methyltransferase (COMT) gene regulation of the prefrontal cortex.  It is suspected by some that when it is inhaled by a person of low intellect, it has only a mild effect. However, when combined with either oxygen (O), hydrogen (H) or Helium (He)  and inhaled by those of higher intelligence, it has a much wider, more potent and even stupefying diffusion effect, that is quite surprising to witness.

Moronium reacts adversely when diffused into blood with a higher alcohol concentration and seems to spontaneously combust when it is exposed to old paper and libraries. Moronium is very difficult and very expensive to isolate.  Moronium seems to be more prevalent during the summer and winter solstices, which may be why moronium intoxication seems to appear around holidays.  Recent attempts in a nearby lab to synthetically create even small crystals of moronium cause an explosion, physically and psychologically stupefying all of the researchers involved and inducing them to leave the study of science and pursue individual careers as drummers.

The presence of moronium seems to be higher in those that do not read, or have an aversion to reading.  There is some correlation that moronium drops in proportion to listening to iTunes podcasts, however, follow-up reading does appear to have a potential lowering affect on the moronium levels within the brain.

Why do I bring this up?

I suspect that this little known element may be responsible for intelligent men and women introducing questionable theoretical science as incontrovertible truth.  Those with suppressed COMT regulation seem to have a propensity to accept theoretical science because it sounds good,  even when there’s really no way to actually prove the theory at the time, or when colleagues have accepted the theory in a peer-pressure instead of peer-review situation.

The stupefying effect of moronium bound COMT produces dogma like:

• We live in a Geocentric Universe (The earth is the center of the universe)
• Miasmatic Theory of Disease (A noxious poisonous vapor of air called miasma filled with decomposed particles of matter believed to be the cause of cholera and chlamydia or the Black Death)
• Ulcers are Caused by Stress
• The World is Flat
• Human Physiology is Controlled by the Four Humors: Black Bile, Yellow Bile, Phlegm and Blood
• Weight is gained by Over-Consumption of Calories & Fat
• Heart disease is Caused by Eating Too Much Fat.

The amazing thing about science is that it is self-correcting (at least it used to be). A scientist makes a set of observations about nature, and then identifies a plausible theory within the laws of nature to fit those observations. Then, researchers take that theory and test it in as many ways as possible, attempting to disprove the theory and isolate the cause of the observation.  If the theory withstands scrutiny it becomes widely accepted.

At any given point in the future, if contradicting evidence emerges, the original theory is discarded and a new theory is then identified.  In essence, this is the simple scientific method, however, in modern day application, it has become a great deal more messy than you’d think.

This approach (application of “the scientific method”) was skirted during the 1960’s and 1970’s regarding the “fat causes heart disease” theoretical proposition.  Interestingly, there was also a notable increase in the number drummers and musicians during the 1980’s Hair Bands era.   This begs the questions, which I wholly agree needs further study: Does moronium exist? and . . . . Did levels of moronium actually increase between 1960 and 1990 causing a surge in the presence and popularity of Hair Bands?

It only took us 20 years to get past the Era of the HairBands, hopefully we can turn the nutritional ship around and recognize the real culprit causing the Diseases of Civilization.

(Author’s Note: For those who may possibly be under the influence of moronium toxicity, the post above is written in sarcastic jest, and to be clear, there IS NOT an element currently under investigation called moronium!)